This Feeling Is Too Strong

cropped-cropped-elephant-logo-2-e1472151006736.pngThis feeling is strong

Never have the balance to get along when everyone says to move on.

Don’t you see I repeat that was once suppose to be me.

I rejoice for those I care for.

Don’t get me wrong, but damn this hurts.

I don’t even bother putting on mini skirts. I’ve never had a hard time being a flirt.

So I could never be called an introvert.

Blissful relationship they say, you won’t find better they say.

Picture perfect type of couple.

It all looks good on camera.

Would you be caught off guard if I told you?

We in two different worlds living on one planet taking advantage in different ways.

I keep saying this is just a phase and there’s no need to part ways.

Prayers get answered some days, but does that mean this is meant to be always?

I won’t deny that I am afraid and haunted by some of my old ways even a few dudes from back in my day.

Many cross my mind some days and I crack a smile.

Long time coming I must say.

I still haven’t arrived past that one time I broke down, and couldn’t really say why through the red toned skin covered in tears swallowing all these feelings that I couldn’t dare to mention cause see that would make me wrong,

and everything I have right now could be gone.

So,

I smile for those who are growing, and then I walk to a room on my own and cry in silence

This feeling is too strong.

Disowned Love

disowned brother

A day and four years apart.

We grew together.

Same blood doesn’t make you family anymore these days.

God hasn’t times changed?

I made mistakes I am far from perfect.

Your days are shortened when you dishonor your mother and father.

I’ve done that and some so I thank God for the life I am spared.

You my brother have crossed every line imaginable.

I grew in the same house with you so I know the journey that you have detoured from.

So you’re a man now?

So you have street cred now?

So you’re a drug dealer and some now?

All that gas you blowing will take you to a place you don’t want to be.

If you and yours knew better you would be respectful,humble, and do better.

Love is a beautiful thing.

Don’t forget the ones that loved you when you were struggling to amount to something.

Be careful with the things you put in the universe.

I learned you can never take them back.

I disowned who you are to me when you can call the woman that gave you life by her first name as if she’s Jenny from the block.

That’s my mother, your mother.

I wish we could go back to the days when we had an understanding of one another.

I saw the truth awhile ago you’re not that same brother.-HonestlyFrank

 

 

EMPTY

empty-space-1515108_1280Counted sheep on my way to sleep with you laying next to me.

Finally the cow jumped over the moon and I was fast asleep.

When I woke up to the rays of sunlight heating on my skin you were gone.

I figured we would talk one more time before I had to see you go.

I never got the chance to see you go.

Gone too soon.

All I had left of you was the sheet we shared the night before that I cuddled to my heart.

I want to explain myself in so many words, but my lips are sealed and the key has been thrown away.

The last time I got to hear your heart beat was the moment before I said I hated us.

The loudest silence I ever heard.

The damage I have inflicted on a nothing to something seems to be so unruly.

There’s no comfort in this garden without an you.

So I will lay back down in the last thing we shared only to close my eyes to see the last image of you laying beside me.

It’s the only comfort I have with you being gone too soon.-HonestlyFrank

BARE

passion-2167479_1280

 

Bare skin with nothing else to show.

I never hid anything from you.

All the lies and all the times you did me wrong.

I stood strong.

In your corner no matter what.

How did you come to terms with breaking me down to nothing.

By no means was this my first heart break, but this was the one to break me.

Are you haunted by the nightmares like I am?

Wanting to go back and sit tight with no pressure.

You were the one for me.

This taught me a lesson that you weren’t the one.

I attest you know what you’ve lost.

Acting out of anger saying reckless things you know aren’t true.

You lost yourself.

Longing for moments, but not missing you.

True to self in this moment.

I won’t find myself loving you someone I once knew.

You lacked every level of gratitude when you constantly misused my heart.

Gone but never forgotten in its truest term.

Bare skinned with nothing else to show.

All the struggles of rebuilding me are being seen.-HonestlyFrank

Passed Up

girl-2175843_1280Where does the time go when you’re alone?

Hours passing minutes passing.

Sun up and sun down.

I’m awake but hardly awake.

Where does the time go when a heart is broken but filled with words unspoken.

The time to speak would be now.

Right now _

I don’t have the guts to speak

I barely have the guts to think.

My words aren’t as deep.

My ideas aren’t as unique.

Where does the time go when my mind is throwing a mental tantrum.

Bypassing all of my actual actions.

I bypassed years by just thinking and not doing; and have the nerve to wonder where does the time go?

She has long hair don’t care with a huge derriere.

Oh boy has suit and tie with a unique swag of fly.

They made it in what seems like yesterday.

I was sleep while they was woke.

They even took some of my ideas off of my pillow.

What a cold world.

Where does the time go?- HonestlyFrank

Arrière grand-mère et fille

 

 

mama joyceI act like you when all my emotions take over.

That’s my way of feeling close to you as if I knew you.

I let your name roll off my tongue often.

That’s my way of letting you hear my voice in need of you.

I have held on to one shirt with your face on it with holes and all; just to have you pinned to my heart.

I consider you one of my best friends.

When I have climaxed into a moment of despair I talk to you for forthcoming hope,direction,attention,and love.

I can only daydream about what our relationship would’ve been.

If you were able to see me become  who I am today; would you be a tad bit proud and say I am spoiled with a smile?

I miss what we never had.-HonestlyFrank

There Is No One Left to Call

ddn-Kinky-Handcuffs

There is no left to call.

Where is mercy so that I can tell it all.

Mercy should hear how easy it is to make a black soul disappear.

Black and White are just colors; but isn’t it funny how one is mistreated more than the other.

I am not saying it to defend what my true skin is.

I am saying my skin, your skin could almost make us kin if you knew what I knew.

He was only 15 years old, and wasn’t trying to impose.

There is no one left to call.

Can you even speak his name to mercy?

I dare you to speak it and explain that he wasn’t armed with the weapon you used on his black soul.

Why should his mother have no one left to call; because you let your metal enforcement get involved to interrupt her child’s life?

These are things I guess cowards like you can’t answer.

You’ll get a tap on your wrist from the authorities, and a pat on the back from a man name Cory thanking you for taking out that 15 year old nigga.

There is no one left to call to tell the saddest story of them all.

None of us are safe.

I am curious to know precinct from precinct how many cases are swept under a rug?

Even if it was drugs is a black life worth being mugged.

Chase them-

And get to leave no traces.

I am far from a racist

So please don’t twist this.

I am, we are intelligent enough to know a sorry excuse for a cop when we see one.

I am angry and not just because I am a black woman.

Don’t stereotype me; you don’t even know me.

That doesn’t matter to you from what I see you didn’t know him; but didn’t mind making him bleed.

Can’t complain about the America we keep, they do what we allow and they barely want to hear us speak.

I am over being scared to look a badge in the eye.

I am over being scared for black men, because I have so many that are kin.

I am over not having no one to call to protect and serve.

It’s really sad that we pay your salary for you to take out our loved ones.

This system that we only call a system; since it’s far from a system.

There is no one left to call.-Honestlyfrank